Retaliation...

Ah, the world can sometimes be so mean! Not really, it just seems that everything happens to you at the same time!

So I finally got my cute little Final Fantasy action figures... I guess action figure isn't the right word for them since they actually don't move, but the point is they are awesome! Yay!!! I'm so excited, now if only I can finish cleaning my room so I can have a place to put them... that would be nice.

My room is a disaster zone right now! I was in the process of cleaning it up... serious cleaning, like washing the walls and getting all the scary dust bunnies, but then it attacked me... and my bulletin board fell off the wall on top of me... so until it gets back up on the wall, I can't progress with my room cleaning. It's really sad actually...

My Kit-Kats have still not come however, and that makes me sad... so I want Kit-Kats all the time because I can't have the ones I ordered! Also, why can you only get dark chocolate Kit-Kats during the Christmas season in a package with the milk chocolate and white chocolate ones???? I don't like white chocolate, so they just stay there forever until someone takes pity on the fact that there are all these white chocolate Kit-Kats left around...

Even on the official Kit-Kat website, I can't find them... so I have to order them from Japan, but they won't send... I think it may be easier to go to Japan, than to wait for them!

Oh well, this post really wasn't put together well... but after all of this, I feel as if I've lost a part of my soul... because I've lost my flash drive! I don't know what to do without it... I feel incomplete... I never realized that I relied on it so much... so until I find it, I think I may just feel confused... I don't know what to do without it!!!! It has almost everything on it!!!! So if anyone finds it, that would be nice... and if someone stole it, I think I may cry...

Song Title: Retaliation
Artist: Final Fantasy VIII Soundtrack (Nobuo Uematsu)

Get Your Dream...

So I have another "pass the dream story". This one is weird, I won't lie... but then again, which of these writing posts are normal???

Speaking of normal, I have decided that there is no real way in that I can be judged as "normal" by most peoples' standards... I think I'm normal, I think that it doesn't matter if I'm not normal in anyone else's book, but whatever... here I am!

But seriously, who cuts themselves on a plastic trash can through a pair of jeans... and then, not only does it bleed, but it also bruises??? Really bad. It looks really gross... it's a good thing it's winter so I won't feel tempted to wear shorts...

Normality is strange... really strange... so I don't understand how people can hope to judge someone on being normal or not... oh well... it's not my place to decide on normalness... just like I'm certain that Wii Fit doesn't take muscle into consideration when deciding what a person's BMI is... but maybe I'm just trying to make myself feel better...

As this stands, I have decided that my dreams are strange at best... so I don't expect anything normal or even remotely normal about these dreams... add my already fairly strange dreams to some of the minds of my friends when they are given free reign over what happens next in my dreams... and you get what I'm about to post on here! Pass the stories are unique in that you don't know where someone will take what you've written... I'm certain my friends feel the same way... when I see what I've done to some of their stories... I only wrote the first part, but somehow my friends were able to get an actual story from a dream I had that did not end...

But here it goes... I'll go ahead and post this... with a disclaimer that I'm not normal, and I don't think many of my friends are either...

The darkness closed in on me. Panting and stiff I ran on. The shadows moved around me and I heard the loud footsteps getting ever nearer. I fell to the ground. My knees were scraped and bloody, but I pulled myself up never the less…

The razor-sharp edges kept hitting my arms and caused me to falter. I reached down to see what it was that hit me… playing cards??? I didn’t realize playing cards were so painful… I already had a collection of fine cuts on my arms and probably under my clothing. Why were they chasing me??? I didn’t have time to think, I was just focusing on getting away. I heard the footsteps trailing off, getting fainter. Finally I had outrun them…

THUNK!!!! I was knocked back so far. A fine white powder covered me body. It tasted kind of sugary… marshmallows?

…or… cocaine? COCAINE!!!? Yum… I thought… yum. I laid on the dark, dark ground, enjoying the colors of the dark and the music of the night and the bleeding of my arm. Then, before I got too close to the emotions bubbling on the edge of my consciousness, dark knife-armed figures surrounded me. I could barely see their outlines. But I knew what they were. CYLON CENTURIONS. “What? You mean, I’m human?” I asked them. Their red eye masks glowed with hidden, intelligent calculations. They remained silent. Then, the emotions started. I laughed like a baby, then a hyena, then a mad man. Then, I started to cry…

Did I start to cry? I want to cry. I’m trying to cry, but nothing is coming out. Maybe if I try harder… no… that never works. At least not for me. Let me try again…

Nope. Still, nothing. I wonder why that is. I’m a human, right? Humans cry. I start laughing uncontrollably again. Laughing? Maybe I’m an insane human. The Cylon Centurions stare at me in disbelief. “What are you laughing about?”

“Hahaha… toe… it’s spelled with an “e”! Hahaha!” It’s really not that funny, but for some reason, it is to me. I wasn’t even thinking about it. “Toe has an o…you know what else has an o? Cylon. Am I a cylon? Who’s a cylon? We're all cylons. That’s it were all cylons. Cylons…were all cylons right?”

The centurions looked at me. “Hello cylon model 13.”

“NO! I’m not a cylon I can’t be a cylon!” I got up and started running towards the nearest cliff. I won’t be convinced I’m a toaster I refuse to be a cylon! I saw the cliff coming up on me I knew what I had to do. I threw myself from the cliff and felt the wind through my hair. I didn’t feel the ground.

I woke up in a tub of a watery like liquid. I was surrounded not by centurions but by the other cylons. 1, 3,4,5,6, and 7 all watching me. Then six said “welcome home 13.”

“13? Wait OW!” The bleeding was overwhelming. “Wait! That white stuff… that’s my blood or its cocaine?”

“Audrey, my love you shouldn’t do cocaine”

“David Boreanaz? Wait, Squall? Are you … a marshmallow?”

“I was,” he said, “but I’m toasted now”

“Wait… you’re a druggie?”… “I’m a druggie?”

“Audrey, of course I am… Why do you think I’m so awesome? And of course you are… you would do anything for me…”

So apparently, my friends had different things on their minds when they took control of my story... originally, there was no drug use or BattleStar references or Final Fantasy characters... but that's what happens when everyone is tired and able to write whatever they want, with nothing to worry about... so I guess I can't complain that much about what was done to mine... when I wrote what I thought of on my friends stories... but yeah, it was an interesting time... and please don't judge by this!

Song Title: Get Your Dream

Artist: TOKIO

Video Killed The Radio Star...

That is so true... it seems that most people have to put a song to a video now if they want it to go anywhere... but I was actually thinking more about movies!

I love movies. With the exception of horror films which I think are psycho- crazy and downright creepy! I will watch almost any other type of movie though, depending on my mood.

I love to watch movies and I love to quote lines from movies and well, I just really like movies. I don't watch much TV, so I guess that may be why.

The only unfortunate thing I have discovered is that I tend to get far too involved in the movies I watch... It gets worse in an actual theater. I tend to be one of the people that are extrememly annoying to the others around me. I tend to talk and cry and yell and cry and laugh and cry and jump and cry...
I'd like to say that I don't really cry that much, but the last movie I remember watching that didn't make me cry was ENVY!!!! Waste of time, I want those two hours back! I have noticed that when I try to keep myself calm and restrained when watching a movie for the first time, I get horrible stomach aches and I start shaking for sometimes almost an hour after finishing the movie. SO ususally I don't even try.

Because of that, I tend to get made fun of. Its really sad and depressing, really. I try so hard to behave and act normal, but if something scares me or something I wasn't expection happens, or some immensly sad moment comes around; I scream, or the waterworks start. Pathetic really! And when I start crying, it takes a long time for me to stop... a very long time, sometimes not until after the movie is over... which can be even more embarassing because I have to walk out with the tears streaming down my face... I've even cried in movies that I watched at school!

I guess that is one of the main reasons why I won't see many movies that I know will be hard for me in the theaters... I prefer to watch them with people who know me really well. I've had too many embarassing moments to watch them with people I don't know very well.

Which is why I have yet to watch THE DARK KNIGHT... I love BATMAN!!!! He's like the best superhero ever! But I cannot easily bring myself to watch it without a number of certain requests... Its very difficult for all of those requests, and I don't know how it will eventually go when I get it together...
I do plan on watching it, and I want to watch it, it's just not going to be pretty!

Oh well, we do what we must I suppose...

Song Title: Video Killed The Radio Star
Artist: The Presidents of the United States of America

Two Princes...

No reason, this song's just stuck in my head... it's one of my favorites and I listened to it about twenty times yesterday...

So, on to my "week" of stupidity. I call it a week, but it's been almost a month. I've been doing some pretty stupid things recently so I have named the time that I have done most of them as the week of stupidity...

1. I bought some things online... because of this experience, I learned I couldn't read. This happened at the end of December. I meant to buy the things that was not where the stupidity was... it was stupid in the fact that I thought I was getting more than one... so when I only got one of each, I was really confused but at the same time, I felt better because I didn't think they could possibly be that cheap... but when I get them all I will be so happy...

2. After I realized that I had only ordered 1, I went out and bought all the others that I could... so now, I hope... that I'm only missing 4 out of 15... and I need them all (not really of course, which is one of the reasons why this was stupid... but now that I have some, I want them all)

3. I bought a birthday present for my friend... her birthday is next week... since it was coming from overseas, I figured I should order it early enough that there would be enough time for it to get here... so in the beginning of January, I bought it... It arrived on the 12th... not even a week after I bought it... strange. So I thought how perfect is this??? I can buy things from this website and they will get here so fast... they sell kit-kats in flavors that I have never heard of before so I thought that it would be interesting and fun to try them... so my friend and I ordered some. BUT, they are now on BACK ORDER!!!!! Why did they have them listed if they weren't readily available??? I was really looking forward to trying blueberry cheesecake and strawberry kit-kats!!!!!

4. The last incredibly stupid thing that I did was yesterday... Back in May I had dyed a part of my hair purple... it washed out pretty quickly but the part where my hair was bleached was still there (obviously). I was really starting to get sick of it and I decided that I wanted to dye my hair so that it would be around the same color again. So I went to the store to look at hair dye and to pick out a good color that would probably get all my hair to a uniformed color... I was going for a dark brown... so I really should have picked up the dark brown hair dye... but I thought that color looked kind of weird so I grabbed the natural black hair dye instead... (the pictures showed a dark brown result). DON'T BELIEVE THE PICTURES!!!!!!!!!! My hair is now black... and I'm not sure if it actually looks good on me or not... several people have told me that they thought it looked good, and I almost believe them... but then my mom says things like it will grow out, and it will fade... so I really don't know. Personally, I think it could be alot worse... I mean, I could have blond hair... I don't think that would look too good, but i don't know, some of my siblings have blond hair and it looks good on them... I guess I'll just have to see...

So that is how my week of stupidity has gone for the most part... I've left out the little things and just focused on the really big stupid things that I've done...

Thanks for reading!

Song Title: Two Princes
Artist: Spin Doctors
(If you haven't heard this song, I think you should...)

It's Been Awhile!

Actually it really has been a long time since the last time I have posted. I feel really bad about that and this post is gonna be kinda long. I have 2 new writing things that I have done that I'm gonna post, so I guess that will take up most of this... sorry. But I feel better about posting my writing and I seem to be gaining confidence about letting other people read my writing!

So here's the first one... this prompt was to write about a dream we had, then we passed it around and other people finished it... it's a little creepy, but since it started with one of my dreams it pretty much had to be... and my friends took it way out, and made it maybe even more crazy than it actually was!

“Strumming my pain with his fingers

Singing my life with his words

Killing me softly with his song

Killing me softly with his song

Telling my whole life with his words

Killing me softly with his song”

The song played in the background as he cradled me in his lap. I felt so at peace. He gently stroked my hair and soon I felt as if I were going to sleep…

But then he spoke, his voice deep and smooth, sounding much like David Boreanaz, “You know, Audrey,” it surprised me that he knew my name, “you aren’t pretty enough to live.”

“What?” I was confused, “what do you mean? I’m not pretty enough? I don’t get it. I mean I know I’m not beautiful, but that’s alright?”

“You didn’t let me finish,” he interrupted, “I meant to say that you aren’t pretty enough to live without me.”

“Wow, how egocentric of you! You put me in position that I don’t feel like living then act like you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread!”

“Don’t you love me?” he asked.

“I once thought I did, but I’m not a stupid girl. If my Amanda heard what you just said, she’d castrate you.”

“She can’t castrate me… I’m not a male. I’m not human. Audrey, I’m Xavier.”

BBBBBBBBBZZZZZZZZZZZZZPPPPPPPPPP

“OW,” I yelled, Xavier shocked me…I cried out in pain as the force of the shock threw me into the wall, my head landing against it. I awoke with a start and saw that I was bleeding.

“what is this?” I asked

“this is the future. This is the day you die.” He said in that lovely handsome voice. I could practically melt in his arms and live off his eyes.

“why?” I asked. I sounded frightened but I was trying to be brave.

“because I told you earlier your not pretty enough to live.” He said. His voice I started walking towards it. “sooner or later the choices we make end up hurting ourselves.” So dreamy. I didn't even notice the pressure on my back. “ people must be punished for their sins.” My body felt like it was on fire. From love? I'm not sure. “come join me we could be together you and i.” my legs stopped moving and I couldn't breath well. “ill take you to a far away place.” Such a nice voice.

“Xavier?” I asked. “Fire?”

His eyes turned from blue to icy black with red pupils. Suddenly concern gripped my heart. I looked around. I was in a white, padded room. Steam was rolling from my back, around my figure, I supposed from where his hands were on my back.

“You WILL give in to me. I am a GOD, don’t you know this? I have a RIGHT to feel the way I do about myself. I will make you one of my singing, dancing, dead minions!”

The dreaminess was violently yanked from my mind. WHAT? I thought. He was possessed his entire life. Obviously.

I stepped away from him and touched my back where the burning was. My hands felt wet. I looked at them. Blood, blood and water all over. DRIPPING from my fingers.

“What have you done? What have you done to me?!” I screamed.

This is NOT the Xavier I knew. Sure, we would have our fights, and he has been known to act like an 8-year-old who demanded special attention, but still, even with all that, I have a hard time believing this is something he’d do to me—that this is something he’d do to anyone. The Xavier I know wouldn’t even kill his father who has been trying to kill him. So if this isn’t the Xavier I knew, who was he?

It didn’t matter. I have no time to figure it out. I’m bleeding to death, and I’m pretty sure he’s going to try to take over the universe. I have to stop him. If I’m going to die anyway, I’d rather stop him while doing it. I’ve been to the future—he doesn’t rule. That must mean something. That must mean that I stop him! Maybe then people will finally believe that I’m a nice person. But the truth is, I’m not doing this for the world. I’m doing this for Xavier. For the REAL Xavier. I’m suddenly holding a knife in my hand. Where did I get a knife in my hand? It doesn’t matter, either. I can’t kill him, though. Not after that dream I had where I killed something else. I threw up after that, and that was a DREAM. I could never actually do that in real life. Wait… another idea popped into my mind. My arm suddenly hurts—I’m running out of time. It’s the only way! I grab my computer. “Xavier!” I say. The pretender looks at me from behind. I concentrate as hard as I can. A brilliant light illuminates from my computer, and it seems to draw this monster in. “I told you I was the center of gravity!” I exclaim. The pretend Xavier looks surprised. He struggles, but his life force is sucked into my computer. When it happens; when it’s all done, I fall to the floor. I’m exhausted, and I’m in pain. I’m still bleeding. “Don’t worry, Audrey” a kind voice says from behind. “I’m going to be here for you.” I try to open my eyes. Perhaps I am saved! “Squall took my place, Audrey. I no longer have to live in your computer. You freed me. Xavier. I knew it was him.

Yeah, so there's the first one... and this second one was based off a prompt that one of my friends wrote... about how when you die, there's a whole neighborhood around you filled with the dead. So here's what I did with it!

Yesterday, I died.

It was a beautiful ceremony. If you like the idea of rain crashing down and having your body thrown into a hole near a newly planted tree so as not to arouse suspicion…

However, my only wishes were not fulfilled and instead of burying me where I wanted, my murderer seemed to have gone the cheap route and buried me in a hole. Not that it really matters, but I so would have enjoyed having my own burial my own way… I guess that’s what happens when your family and friends aren’t given the luxury of burying their loved one…

The cemetery always seemed like such a quiet and serene place when I was alive. I used to walk around in them all the time and wondered how some of the people in them had died. I bet cemeteries are wonderful places to be laid to rest… I guess I’ll never know.

I met a “friend” today. I saw his ghostly form more clearly than I would have liked… He came towards me.

“I see you are new.” His accent was strange. “How long have you been here?”

“A few hours, I think.” I replied, not sure how I should respond.

“Ah, very fresh. Don’t worry, you’ll get used to this way of ‘life’ rather quickly.”

I was taken aback and slightly confused as to what he meant. I guess it showed on my face because he started talking again. “We all help each other see? It’s similar to how everyone lives now, in groups of houses or buildings. You’ll get to know all of us real soon.”

“But, I didn’t think this was how it happened…”

“Oh sure, for those who get a proper burial and have a final resting place… but for those of us, who never really get a place… we have to take care of each other if we can.”

“You mean I’m a lost soul?”

“Of course. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t be what those mortals call a ghost. Although there are even some people who get laid down who still have a need for something in the realm of the living.”

“How long have you been here? How long will I be here?”

“Well that all depends on you. We all have unfinished business and only when that business is taken care of can we pass on in peace.” He looked sorrowfully around, “which is why I’m still here after 275 years.”

“What?” I stood agape, “but, I don’t even think I have any unfinished business.”

“Well you must, otherwise you wouldn’t be here in the midst of the lost souls.” He waved his hand around and suddenly I realized that I really was surrounded by thousands on thousands of ghostly figures.

“Perhaps your business had to do with revenge.” A quiet girl said to me after hearing my tale. “There are some here who wish revenge on those who killed them. So, they influence the living to help with that goal. They are usually the first to leave. It must be nice.”

“Why would I want revenge? I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I don’t even know who killed me. One minute I was alive, the next, dead.”

“It was just a thought.” She shrugged her shoulders, “I don’t even know my reason for being here. I died of scarlet fever several hundred years ago, and I can’t think of any unfinished business I could possibly have.”

“Maybe, you hadn’t been with your family as long as you liked… so you stayed around, but when you passed over, you couldn’t remember that reason.” I was pushing for something.

She gazed at me. “Do you think that could have been it? I didn’t really get to spend much time with my family. But that thought never occurred to me until you mentioned it. I should have tried that.” She wandered off.

“This is why we all collaborate together. We are able to help others because we still think differently form others. The thoughts and ideas you have may be able to help one or even half of these people find their reason for staying behind long after their bodies have decayed.” The man I had first talked to was back. “When we help each other, we are that much closer to finding our own reason for not crossing over.”

“But I want to cross over!” I was growing weary of it all. I wanted to cross over so badly, but something just kept holding me back.

“You weren’t placed here by mistake; there is some unfinished business for you. You may not know what it is now, or maybe not even in 100 years, but have no doubt, that once you find it you will indeed cross over.”

So now I’m stuck here with a bunch of angry or depressed or disillusioned ghosts. If I could, I would cross over, but it seems that I have “unfinished business”. If it wasn’t for that stupid guy who killed me, I could be happy. Because I’d still be alive and then when I actually did die, I probably wouldn’t have unfinished business! Stupid guy!!!!! What was his name??? If I could only remember it….

Oh goodness, maybe I am here for revenge…

And there you have it, the end... sorry yet again on how long this post is and how it's just my writing club stuff... but I will actually write a good post about life, the universe, or whatever else I feel like!!!!

Song Title: It's Been Awhile

Artist: Staind