Daydream Believer...

So people have been increasingly mean to me recently... I think I may have overstayed my welcome...

Just that, I don't know where to go... I mean, I haven't been anywhere else... so I just don't go anywhere...

My family is here, my friends are here... so where do I go? I don't like people being mean to me... but I guess I'll just have to continually deal with it...

But I have decided to use this post to write about my dreams...

My dreams meaning what I dream about at night... they are weird.

I have divided all my dreams into four categories and I'll explain what they all mean as I see them.

1. Normal Dreams: my normal dreams, I only assume they are normal. These are the dreams that I don't remember. At all. I wake up and have no memory of what I dreamed about...

2. Nightmares: as you can imagine these are the dreams that frighten me. I usually get traumatized by these dreams and they involve at least one thing I'm afraid of... since I'm extremely susceptible to what happens in my dreams, I have a hard time doing anything that may have been in my dreams... so the song "feed the birds" is one of the most frightening songs I could ever hear...

3. Boy rejection: I don't know what else to call these dreams, and they don't really fit anywhere else... These dreams follow a very similar pattern... a boy rejects me in some way... and usually I die. They are rather interesting, and I don't really think they are nightmares, just really weird dreams. The last one of these that I had was about a guy who would come visit me in the hospital because I was dying. Apparently, I wasn't dying fast enough though, because he killed me with a knife. Strange really... but there you have it...

4. Weird dreams: These are the rest of the dreams that I remember. They don't fall in any of the other categories, so I just put them all here. They have anything happen in them... I've been a cartoon, I've had amnesia, I've been cloned. So these dreams all just fall under this last category...

Oh well, that's probably more than anyone cared to know about my dreams...
Well, thanks for reading:

Song Title: Daydream Believer
Artist: Monkees

All At Once...

Ever just have one of those days where it seems that nothing seems to want to go your way...

Ha! Yeah, it happens... I just wish it didn't have to all at the same time!

My friend decided to tell me today about all these horrible things that would just make me sad. And they succeeded!

I also have a headache and a cold... it just likes to stay around forever. I think I want to cry.

Another of my friends is really sick and I can't do anything about it... so I can't do ANYTHING!

Why??? Why can't I do anything when I want to???

My computer still insists on being evil...

It's still February! I hate February! It just keeps going on and on and no matter how "short" everyone tells me it is, I still feel like it should have been over at least three weeks ago.

It's still cold too... I want spring!!!!!

Oh well, I guess February will be over soon, then maybe I'll start feeling better again...

That would be nice...

Song Title: All At Once
Artist: The Fray

99 Red Balloons...

So, yesterday was a fun day. I remembered that I was allergic to fiberglass as I was helping some of my friends with insulation... when I got home, my parents tried to convince me that actually everyone is somewhat allergic to it, or rather they have a reaction to it when it comes in contact with their skin... but all my friends were fine!

My computer decided it would be fun to shock me... I think he may be trying to commit suicide... since he doesn't like me either.

I hate February! It is the longest, most annoying month... and it has probably the most pathetic excuse for a holiday... Seriously, that's annoying... and irritating. And February just keeps trudging on in its cold, dismal way! Disgusting!

Sometimes I find writing club fairly awkward. For example, yesterday's prompt seemed simple enough: items from one place, used in a different setting. Well, it was fun, in a sick, morbid, twisted way... this time it wasn't entirely my fault that I ended up with a story like I did. But I did write it!
So, here were my items found in or on a human body: femur, tongue, hair, toenails, eye, and heart.
And my setting was: The remains of my town after a nuclear strike...
So that is where my story went...
You can read it if you want to, but I will not hold it against you if you don't. By the way, the name for this post appears in this story which is why I named it 99 Red Balloons.

Sometimes my stomach just feels nauseous. As if for no reason... I don't really know why and it just comes and goes... so sometimes I think that I'm going to throw up... but then I don't. Sorry that's a little random, but its just weird... because it can happen if I haven't eaten anything or if I have, at any time of day and then I get confused...

SO okay; I'll post my story now...

I shall preface this with… I have no choice: BEWARE OF WHAT IS WRITTEN BELOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My bruised body ached. I stood up looking at the chaos all around me. How did I survive? The house was completely demolished.

The landscape looked completely alien. Lafayette had never seemed so red and eerie before. I didn’t like it. My foot landed on something soft. I looked down… and promptly retched. A portion of a body lay in front of me. I think I stepped on tongue. I tried not to think about the rest of the wreckage around me… but I kept seeing shapes in the black burned ground. Was that… a heart? A leg, with the foot torn off? A stray foot, with blackened toenails? Sickened I turned away, only to see a face, one single eye staring blankly up at me… the other shrouded in the blackness of the hair. Why was I alive to witness this horror? Why couldn’t I have died too?

A dog scampered past me with an overly large bone in his mouth. I pretended it didn’t look like it had once been a femur. I walked on. What was I searching for? Some life perhaps. Did my friends survive? How could I find them in this war zone? Is that where Target used to be? My sense of direction was severely impeded by the dismal red glow. The entire landscape was so flat.

I looked around me at the piles of broken merchandise. I found a small package of balloons. Desperately I ripped the package open, and found what it was that I was looking for. With no helium available to me, I blew it up on my own. A song started playing through my sad and troubled mind…I began to sing it out loud. “If I could find a souvenir, just to prove the world was here. And here it is a red balloon; I think of you and let it go…” As I finished the song, I let the balloon fall from my hands. The wind carried it away. I followed it with my eyes, until the fiery glow swallowed it up…

If you made it all the way to the end, thanks for reading!

Song Title: 99 Red Balloons
Artist: Nena

Retaliation...

Ah, the world can sometimes be so mean! Not really, it just seems that everything happens to you at the same time!

So I finally got my cute little Final Fantasy action figures... I guess action figure isn't the right word for them since they actually don't move, but the point is they are awesome! Yay!!! I'm so excited, now if only I can finish cleaning my room so I can have a place to put them... that would be nice.

My room is a disaster zone right now! I was in the process of cleaning it up... serious cleaning, like washing the walls and getting all the scary dust bunnies, but then it attacked me... and my bulletin board fell off the wall on top of me... so until it gets back up on the wall, I can't progress with my room cleaning. It's really sad actually...

My Kit-Kats have still not come however, and that makes me sad... so I want Kit-Kats all the time because I can't have the ones I ordered! Also, why can you only get dark chocolate Kit-Kats during the Christmas season in a package with the milk chocolate and white chocolate ones???? I don't like white chocolate, so they just stay there forever until someone takes pity on the fact that there are all these white chocolate Kit-Kats left around...

Even on the official Kit-Kat website, I can't find them... so I have to order them from Japan, but they won't send... I think it may be easier to go to Japan, than to wait for them!

Oh well, this post really wasn't put together well... but after all of this, I feel as if I've lost a part of my soul... because I've lost my flash drive! I don't know what to do without it... I feel incomplete... I never realized that I relied on it so much... so until I find it, I think I may just feel confused... I don't know what to do without it!!!! It has almost everything on it!!!! So if anyone finds it, that would be nice... and if someone stole it, I think I may cry...

Song Title: Retaliation
Artist: Final Fantasy VIII Soundtrack (Nobuo Uematsu)

Get Your Dream...

So I have another "pass the dream story". This one is weird, I won't lie... but then again, which of these writing posts are normal???

Speaking of normal, I have decided that there is no real way in that I can be judged as "normal" by most peoples' standards... I think I'm normal, I think that it doesn't matter if I'm not normal in anyone else's book, but whatever... here I am!

But seriously, who cuts themselves on a plastic trash can through a pair of jeans... and then, not only does it bleed, but it also bruises??? Really bad. It looks really gross... it's a good thing it's winter so I won't feel tempted to wear shorts...

Normality is strange... really strange... so I don't understand how people can hope to judge someone on being normal or not... oh well... it's not my place to decide on normalness... just like I'm certain that Wii Fit doesn't take muscle into consideration when deciding what a person's BMI is... but maybe I'm just trying to make myself feel better...

As this stands, I have decided that my dreams are strange at best... so I don't expect anything normal or even remotely normal about these dreams... add my already fairly strange dreams to some of the minds of my friends when they are given free reign over what happens next in my dreams... and you get what I'm about to post on here! Pass the stories are unique in that you don't know where someone will take what you've written... I'm certain my friends feel the same way... when I see what I've done to some of their stories... I only wrote the first part, but somehow my friends were able to get an actual story from a dream I had that did not end...

But here it goes... I'll go ahead and post this... with a disclaimer that I'm not normal, and I don't think many of my friends are either...

The darkness closed in on me. Panting and stiff I ran on. The shadows moved around me and I heard the loud footsteps getting ever nearer. I fell to the ground. My knees were scraped and bloody, but I pulled myself up never the less…

The razor-sharp edges kept hitting my arms and caused me to falter. I reached down to see what it was that hit me… playing cards??? I didn’t realize playing cards were so painful… I already had a collection of fine cuts on my arms and probably under my clothing. Why were they chasing me??? I didn’t have time to think, I was just focusing on getting away. I heard the footsteps trailing off, getting fainter. Finally I had outrun them…

THUNK!!!! I was knocked back so far. A fine white powder covered me body. It tasted kind of sugary… marshmallows?

…or… cocaine? COCAINE!!!? Yum… I thought… yum. I laid on the dark, dark ground, enjoying the colors of the dark and the music of the night and the bleeding of my arm. Then, before I got too close to the emotions bubbling on the edge of my consciousness, dark knife-armed figures surrounded me. I could barely see their outlines. But I knew what they were. CYLON CENTURIONS. “What? You mean, I’m human?” I asked them. Their red eye masks glowed with hidden, intelligent calculations. They remained silent. Then, the emotions started. I laughed like a baby, then a hyena, then a mad man. Then, I started to cry…

Did I start to cry? I want to cry. I’m trying to cry, but nothing is coming out. Maybe if I try harder… no… that never works. At least not for me. Let me try again…

Nope. Still, nothing. I wonder why that is. I’m a human, right? Humans cry. I start laughing uncontrollably again. Laughing? Maybe I’m an insane human. The Cylon Centurions stare at me in disbelief. “What are you laughing about?”

“Hahaha… toe… it’s spelled with an “e”! Hahaha!” It’s really not that funny, but for some reason, it is to me. I wasn’t even thinking about it. “Toe has an o…you know what else has an o? Cylon. Am I a cylon? Who’s a cylon? We're all cylons. That’s it were all cylons. Cylons…were all cylons right?”

The centurions looked at me. “Hello cylon model 13.”

“NO! I’m not a cylon I can’t be a cylon!” I got up and started running towards the nearest cliff. I won’t be convinced I’m a toaster I refuse to be a cylon! I saw the cliff coming up on me I knew what I had to do. I threw myself from the cliff and felt the wind through my hair. I didn’t feel the ground.

I woke up in a tub of a watery like liquid. I was surrounded not by centurions but by the other cylons. 1, 3,4,5,6, and 7 all watching me. Then six said “welcome home 13.”

“13? Wait OW!” The bleeding was overwhelming. “Wait! That white stuff… that’s my blood or its cocaine?”

“Audrey, my love you shouldn’t do cocaine”

“David Boreanaz? Wait, Squall? Are you … a marshmallow?”

“I was,” he said, “but I’m toasted now”

“Wait… you’re a druggie?”… “I’m a druggie?”

“Audrey, of course I am… Why do you think I’m so awesome? And of course you are… you would do anything for me…”

So apparently, my friends had different things on their minds when they took control of my story... originally, there was no drug use or BattleStar references or Final Fantasy characters... but that's what happens when everyone is tired and able to write whatever they want, with nothing to worry about... so I guess I can't complain that much about what was done to mine... when I wrote what I thought of on my friends stories... but yeah, it was an interesting time... and please don't judge by this!

Song Title: Get Your Dream

Artist: TOKIO

Video Killed The Radio Star...

That is so true... it seems that most people have to put a song to a video now if they want it to go anywhere... but I was actually thinking more about movies!

I love movies. With the exception of horror films which I think are psycho- crazy and downright creepy! I will watch almost any other type of movie though, depending on my mood.

I love to watch movies and I love to quote lines from movies and well, I just really like movies. I don't watch much TV, so I guess that may be why.

The only unfortunate thing I have discovered is that I tend to get far too involved in the movies I watch... It gets worse in an actual theater. I tend to be one of the people that are extrememly annoying to the others around me. I tend to talk and cry and yell and cry and laugh and cry and jump and cry...
I'd like to say that I don't really cry that much, but the last movie I remember watching that didn't make me cry was ENVY!!!! Waste of time, I want those two hours back! I have noticed that when I try to keep myself calm and restrained when watching a movie for the first time, I get horrible stomach aches and I start shaking for sometimes almost an hour after finishing the movie. SO ususally I don't even try.

Because of that, I tend to get made fun of. Its really sad and depressing, really. I try so hard to behave and act normal, but if something scares me or something I wasn't expection happens, or some immensly sad moment comes around; I scream, or the waterworks start. Pathetic really! And when I start crying, it takes a long time for me to stop... a very long time, sometimes not until after the movie is over... which can be even more embarassing because I have to walk out with the tears streaming down my face... I've even cried in movies that I watched at school!

I guess that is one of the main reasons why I won't see many movies that I know will be hard for me in the theaters... I prefer to watch them with people who know me really well. I've had too many embarassing moments to watch them with people I don't know very well.

Which is why I have yet to watch THE DARK KNIGHT... I love BATMAN!!!! He's like the best superhero ever! But I cannot easily bring myself to watch it without a number of certain requests... Its very difficult for all of those requests, and I don't know how it will eventually go when I get it together...
I do plan on watching it, and I want to watch it, it's just not going to be pretty!

Oh well, we do what we must I suppose...

Song Title: Video Killed The Radio Star
Artist: The Presidents of the United States of America

Two Princes...

No reason, this song's just stuck in my head... it's one of my favorites and I listened to it about twenty times yesterday...

So, on to my "week" of stupidity. I call it a week, but it's been almost a month. I've been doing some pretty stupid things recently so I have named the time that I have done most of them as the week of stupidity...

1. I bought some things online... because of this experience, I learned I couldn't read. This happened at the end of December. I meant to buy the things that was not where the stupidity was... it was stupid in the fact that I thought I was getting more than one... so when I only got one of each, I was really confused but at the same time, I felt better because I didn't think they could possibly be that cheap... but when I get them all I will be so happy...

2. After I realized that I had only ordered 1, I went out and bought all the others that I could... so now, I hope... that I'm only missing 4 out of 15... and I need them all (not really of course, which is one of the reasons why this was stupid... but now that I have some, I want them all)

3. I bought a birthday present for my friend... her birthday is next week... since it was coming from overseas, I figured I should order it early enough that there would be enough time for it to get here... so in the beginning of January, I bought it... It arrived on the 12th... not even a week after I bought it... strange. So I thought how perfect is this??? I can buy things from this website and they will get here so fast... they sell kit-kats in flavors that I have never heard of before so I thought that it would be interesting and fun to try them... so my friend and I ordered some. BUT, they are now on BACK ORDER!!!!! Why did they have them listed if they weren't readily available??? I was really looking forward to trying blueberry cheesecake and strawberry kit-kats!!!!!

4. The last incredibly stupid thing that I did was yesterday... Back in May I had dyed a part of my hair purple... it washed out pretty quickly but the part where my hair was bleached was still there (obviously). I was really starting to get sick of it and I decided that I wanted to dye my hair so that it would be around the same color again. So I went to the store to look at hair dye and to pick out a good color that would probably get all my hair to a uniformed color... I was going for a dark brown... so I really should have picked up the dark brown hair dye... but I thought that color looked kind of weird so I grabbed the natural black hair dye instead... (the pictures showed a dark brown result). DON'T BELIEVE THE PICTURES!!!!!!!!!! My hair is now black... and I'm not sure if it actually looks good on me or not... several people have told me that they thought it looked good, and I almost believe them... but then my mom says things like it will grow out, and it will fade... so I really don't know. Personally, I think it could be alot worse... I mean, I could have blond hair... I don't think that would look too good, but i don't know, some of my siblings have blond hair and it looks good on them... I guess I'll just have to see...

So that is how my week of stupidity has gone for the most part... I've left out the little things and just focused on the really big stupid things that I've done...

Thanks for reading!

Song Title: Two Princes
Artist: Spin Doctors
(If you haven't heard this song, I think you should...)